Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Jiggy in the Jungle

I wrote yesterday about these three guys getting arrested on Sunday afternoon and charged with counts of indecent exposure for getting caught messing around at the Hawkeye Wildlife Area. It's part of an effort by the DNR to crack down on illegal activity within the park, stuff like public sex, vandalism, alcohol violation, and littering.

Of course, three guys having sex in a public park is salacious and the story has been all around the local news programs. This is what KWWL had to say about the story:


In case you cannot read the second paragraph, it reads "Johnson County deputies say... both from Cedar Rapids were allegedly getting jiggy in the jungle when a man walking on the Hawkeye Wildlife Area noticed and called the police."

Yes. "Jiggy in the jungle." That's how KWWL reported these arrests last night on the air. That's the quality of reporting that they offered Southeast Iowa last night.

KWWL has since changed the wording of their report to say "were allegedly performing sexual acts."

Monday, August 31, 2015

Three Iowa Men Charged with Indecent Exposure at the Hawkeye Wildlife Area

Three men were arrested and charged with various sex acts in the nearby Hawkeye Wildlife Area.

In one instance, a hiker reported to a conservation officer that "he was offended" after he ran across two men performing oral sex on each other at 1:30 PM on one of the trails. The officer came across the two accused men. Both were from Cedar Rapids. One is 68-years-old and the other is 54-years-old. They were both charged with Indecent Exposure and face up to one year in jail if convicted of this serious misdemeanor.

Later that date, the same witness was approached by a 51-year-old man from Coralville, who hit on him and asked that the two men masturbate together. The offer was declined. Shortly afterwards, a second person came across the Coralville man and observed him with "his back turned and his 'arm and hand appearing to move rapidly in and out of the crotch area.'" The witness approached him and saw him putting his genitals back into his pants.

This third man was found by the officer and arrested. Not only was he charged with Indecent Exposure, but he was discovered with a marijuana pipe. So now he's also facing a charge of Possession of Drug Paraphernalia. He faces up to 13 months in jail, if convicted.

I understand that there are guys who enjoy cruising for other guys out in the trails, but there are better options out there. You can hook up with other guys via Craigslist or Grindr or whatever. There are also a few nearby adult movie shops around here if you really want to hook up "old school."

But the correctional response to these types of Indecent Exposure arrests is anything but "old school." You can end up in jail and then on a sex abuse registry for the rest of your life, which messes with your ability to work or live in the house/apartment of your choosing or go back to the parks that you obviously enjoy.

Not to mention, the negative public response that happens when people discover guys having sex with each other in public in the middle of the day!

So next time you feel the urge to look for a random hook-up at one of the local parks, place an advertisement on Craigslist instead!

Sunday, August 30, 2015

"Survivors" 40th Anniversary: Episode 19 ("The Witch")

This is the nineteenth in a series of blog posts dedicated to the 40th anniversary of BBC's "Survivors" television series. "Survivors" followed a core group of characters who managed to survived a devastating viral outbreak -- one which managed to kill off somewhere between 95-99% of humanity. Society has crumbled and now those who remain must relearn the old way if they have any hope of surviving much longer.


Today's episode, titled "The Witch," turned out to be pretty basic. We were introduced to two more members of the Whitecross community. One is an older woman named Peggy (played by Catherine Finn):

Peggy
The other is a bit of an outsider named Mina (played by Delia Paton). We've heard of her in a past episode, but this is the first that we've actually seen her. Mina lives alone with her baby Matthew on the edges of Whitecross. She generally keeps to herself and is a bit of an odd-bird. She mixes with the others once weekly, when she gathers flour for the community's baking.

Mina & Baby Matthew
Here are two things that you need to know about this issue. First, Hubert wants to mess around with Mina and Mina is disgusted by Hubert. That doesn't stop him from trying -- for all the good it does him!


Here's the other thing: Hubert is a trouble-maker. He doesn't like John and Lizzie hanging around Mina's home. After all, she might eventually agree to his advances and he can't risk have the kids blocking that action. So he convinces them that Mina is a witch who likes to harm children!


Which makes it poor timing when Mina tries making marbles and a Hubert doll out of clay. She meant these to be toys for the kids -- to thank them for helping out with the baby. Instead, they think that she used her witchy magic to cause harm to Hubert!


In case you can't tell, that's mini-Hubert's leg breaking off! Which is another bit of bad timing, because Hubert sprained his ankle the previous night while trying to break into Mina's house for a bit of hanky-panky. Not that he will admit to it. Instead, he feeds into the children's fear that Mina is a witch, who'd place a curse on him.

Soon enough, pretty much everyone is freaking out about Mina. For example, Mina was accused of cursing the cows so they that they wouldn't produce milk (Actually, Hubert forgot to separate the cows from the weaning calves so there was no milk for the people.)

Pretty soon, Mina is racing off into the late-night wilderness to escape Whitecross' raving witch-hunters. Fortunately, they come to their senses before there's too much harm done and Mina returns to the community -- free from the stigma of being a witch!

I can forgive the kids for believing Hubert -- but people like Pet and Peggy and Jack aren't so removed from modern society that they've begun believing in witch curses -- certainly not at the coaching of a known trouble-maker like Hubert! Next time, the people of Whitecross need to chase Hubert off instead of listening to his slanderous lies!

Next week's episode is called "A Friend In Need."

Austin Armacost of "A-List: New York" Competing on Latest "Celebrity Big Brother"

I have been a fan of CBS' "Big Brother" since its first season. I generally watch every episode until mid-season. Then the Houseguests vote out all of my favorites and my attendance peters out for the rest of the season. That's pretty much where I'm at right now.

But here's some fun "Big Brother" news from the UK... The latest season of "Celebrity Big Brother" just began and it features Austin Armacost!

I'm sure that most of you are wondering who Austin Armacost is?? I keep being told that he's most famous for being the ex-boyfriend of Marc Jacobs, but I don't know who Marc Jacobs is. I know Austin for being the resident bad boy on Logo's "The A-List: New York." He was the former model whom everyone called fat -- even though he's fitter than most men. He liked to drink and eat and cause trouble with the other guys.


He ended up getting booed by the "CBB" audience for saying that British customer service sucks, which he initially brushed off. But it bugged him enough that he brought it up to the other Celebrity Houseguests and learned that nobody else got booed.

Obviously, I'm not going to be able to watch the show from the USA. But I really can't wait to hear gossip about this newest season of "Celebrity Big Brother!"

Saturday, August 29, 2015

The Girls Return to Riverdale in BETTY & VERONICA #277 // Six Reasons to be Glad It's Done!

"Farewell Riverdale" wrapped up this week in BETTY & VERONICA #277. There's not much that I can say about it. I was pretty excited about the storyline. I was looking forward to the girls' overseas adventures. I was looking forward to the new girls (Banni from India and Violette from France) assuming a prominent place within Riverdale's teen population.

Instead, most of the storyline was a huge mope-fest!

We spent the first two issues waiting for the girls to leave and then a full third issue waiting for the new girls to show up. And then Archie ended up being overly depressing without either Betty or Veronica around him. And then this latest issue was an entire issue devoted to the girls realizing that they really miss Riverdale, as well as their sluggish wrap-up!

The issue ended with Betty and Veronica returning to Riverdale and everyone glad to have them. So nothing really changed. The girls are now back, Archie is happy, and things will revert to normal.


Ultimately, this felt like a final issue for the series -- and I'm pretty sure that it is the next-to-final issue of the series. Next issue will be a prom-themed issues -- which is funny because they very pointedly had a prom inserted into this issue. But who's to say that Riverdale High cannot have two separate proms in two subsequent issues of BETTY & VERONICA?

After that, the series will be relaunched -- and I'm pretty sure that this will be a good thing. This series has floundered for the past few years. We've floated between "fairy tale princess" stories and "overly emotional foreign exchange" stories for too long. I think we're ready for something fresh and new.

Meanwhile, here are some things that stood out in this issue:

1. Betty & Veronica Have Grown During their Studies (At Least, Ronnie Has...): Even after they stopped masquerading as each other last issue, Veronica has managed to keep hold of her inner-Betty and Betty has managed to keep hold of her own inner-Veronica.

 And...

2. Jughead and Dilton Are the New Archie and Reggie: When the girls left the USA, who knew that Riverdale resident woman-hater and nerd would hook up with their replacements? At least these guys don't keep juggling their new girlfriends like Archie typically does with his girls!


3. Teen Love Only Goes So Far: The school year is wrapping up. That means that Banni and Violette both have to go. It's possible that we will see some long-distance romance action within the digests -- but don't count on it!

And...

4. Archie and Reggie Are Pathetic: These guys are constantly chasing after girls. But they cannot function while B&V are overseas? I really don't buy it.


5. Bye Banni! Bye Violette!: It's time for our two international girls to go back home. You would think that they ready to see their families and their old friends again -- but first they both need a good sob!


6. Nobody Told Betty & Veronica About the Relaunch?: Imagine that you went away for a while and then returned to find that everything that you knew about Riverdale was the same, and yet completely different? I think someone needs to break it to the girls gently...


"I Gotta Be Me" was written by Michael Uslan, penciled by Dan Parent, inked by Bob Smith, colored by Glenn Whitmore, and lettered by Jack Morelli.

Friday, August 28, 2015

CBN News Reports on KY County Clerk Kim Davis' Refusal to Issue Marriage Licenses Because of the Gays // Calls Her "Embattled"

CBN reported on the "County Clerk Kim Davis refusing to issue marriage licenses to the people of her community because she disagrees with gays marrying" situation. She is being supported by another county clerk named Casey Davis (no relation).

This is what CBN had to say:
A Kentucky county clerk is bike riding across the state to bring attention to the plight of Kim Davis. She is the clerk who is fighting a legal battle for her refusal to issue marriage licenses. Casey County clerk, Casey Davis, will bike ride over 460 miles across the state. Kim Davis is the clerk in Rowan County and she is still refusing to issue marriage licenses, even after a federal appeals court upheld a judge’s directive to issue the licenses this week. Because of her Christian faith, Davis stopped issuing all licenses after the Supreme Court made gay marriage a constitutional right. Casey Davis has also stopped issuing licenses because of his faith, but so far he is not facing a legal battle.
I'm pretty sure that these clerks never issued a faith-based litmus test for those seeking marriage licenses before the Supreme Court decision. God forbid that these clerks process the paperwork necessary for these citizens to get married. It's been noted that Kim Davis has been divorced and remarried several times in her lifetime. Imagine if a Catholic county clerk had refused to process her paperwork.


As it is, she would prefer that the citizens of Davis' county -- those very same people who'd originally voted her into office -- will need to travel out of county. This is a time- and money-burden for the people of her county. Hopefully, enough people will rally against both Kim Davis and Casey Davis on their next election cycle.

Update: As noted by CBN News, Casey Davis from Casey County, KY, rode his bike to Rowan County, KS, in order to support Kim Davis' right to avoid doing her job.

Casey Davis arrived this morning in in Rowan County was greeted by Kim Davis and several of her supporters:
The Rowan County Clerk came outside to welcome Casey Davis, who began his trek Thursday morning. The Casey County Clerk showed some emotion as he spoke about his journey. The two of them, who are not related, but say they are brother and sister in Christ, spent about 30 minutes inside the Rowan County Clerk's office. 

"I don't hate these people. Kim doesn't hate these people. Kim is not trying to keep them from getting what they want," Casey Davis said. "I mean, I've ridden a bike across how many counties? They can drive in a car much easier today and go get that if that's what they want."
Actually, Casey Davis assumes that everyone in his county and in Kim Davis' county have cars that make it easy for them to travel from county to county. They also assume that everyone has the time to travel to random counties throughout the state of Kentucky looking for a county clerk that actually performs his or her job duties instead of, for example, riding his bike across the state of Kentucky or attending political rallies.

Thursday, August 27, 2015

Rick Harrison of "Pawn Stars" to Headline at Marco Rubio Event Tomorrow Evening in Ankeny, IA

Are you a fan of History channel's "Pawn Stars" reality TV show? If so, you might want to know that one of the show's stars will be stumping for Republican presidential hopeful Senator Marco Rubio tomorrow evening here in Iowa:
Rick Harrison, owner of the Gold & Silver Pawn Shop in Las Vegas, (Jon's Note: And reality TV personality from "Pawn Stars") will share why he's endorsing the Florida senator, and will meet with Iowa voters, according to a news release. 
"When this guy walked into my shop, I knew he was the real deal," Harrison said of Rubio, who's seeking the GOP nomination for president, in a campaign video. "Trust me, I know a good investment when I see one."
Harrison will be appearing with Rubio tomorrow evening in Ankeny, IA. This event will celebrate the opening of Rubio's Iowa campaign HQ.

Needless to say, I won't be there, but you can follow this link to find the time and address.

Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Porn Star Claims She Had Rough Sex With Josh Duggar Twice While His Wife Was Pregnant // Josh Duggar Checks Into Rehab

You remember how Josh Duggar (the former "19 Kids & Counting" star who "forcibly fondled" five girls when he was a teen -- including four of his young sisters -- and who was an executive leader with the Family Research Council until earlier this summer) got outed last week as a paid subscriber of two separate Ashley Madison accounts and one OKCupid account? It was also revealed elsewhere that he had a fake Facebook account, which he used to friend various strippers.

In Touch Weekly reported today that he allegedly had sex on two separate occasions with a stripper and porn star named Danica Dillon while his wife Anna was pregnant with their fourth child:
Danica — who passed a polygraph test conducted for In Touch by a top certified polygrapher on Aug. 24 — details her two sexual encounters with Josh in the new issue of In Touch, on newsstands now. The first occurred after Josh approached her at the Gold Club in Philadelphia, where she was performing, in mid-March and the second only a month later when Danica was performing at Creekside Cabaret in Colmar, Pa.

“He walked into the Gold Club like a normal patron and said he’d been a fan for a long time and has watched my career grow — he even said from before my boob job until recently — and that he loved watching my very first scene on [an adult website],” she tells In Touch. “Then it got creepy.”

After watching her show and "eyeballing me," Danica says he bought $600 in private dances and then “asked me how would he be able to spend the evening with me.” She reveals to In Touch that Josh was violent with her when they had sex, he did not use protection and gave her thousands of dollars after their encounters...

“He was manhandling me, basically tossing me around like I was a rag doll,” Danica, whose real name is Ashley Lewis, and although the sex was consensual, “It was very traumatic. I’ve had rough sex before, but this was terrifying.”
That's all to say that the Duggar family wants you to know that Josh is now in long-term rehab for unspecified reasons:
We are so thankful for the outpouring of love, care and prayers for our family during this most difficult situation with Josh. As parents we are so deeply grieved by our son’s decisions and actions. His wrong choices have deeply hurt his precious wife and children and have negatively affected so many others. He has also brought great insult to the values and faith we hold dear. Yesterday Josh checked himself into a long-term treatment center. For him it will be a long journey toward wholeness and recovery. We pray that in this he comes to complete repentance and sincere change. In the meantime, we will be offering our love, care and devoted support to Anna and our grandchildren as she also receives counsel and help for her own heart and future. During this time we continue to look to God—He is our rock and comfort. We ask for your continued prayers for our entire family.
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Open Response to Kevin O'Brien of "At The End Of The Day Podcast" & Ray Comfort of "Audacity" Regarding Gay Wedding Discrimination VS. Lion-Eating Discrimination

I regularly listen to a variety of podcasts. They help me get through wok. They help me get through my workouts. One of those podcasts is the "At The End Of The Day" podcast, which is made by the people who are making a Christian/LGBT film called "At The End Of The Day." The film is a "feature-length dramatic comedy about a fundamentalist Christian professor who experiences a profound change when he finds himself undercover in a gay support group to foil their launch of an LGBT homeless teen shelter." The filmmakers just held a successful Kickstarter campaign, which I contributed towards.

In this week's podcast, Kevin O'Brien interviewed Ray Comfort, who just came out with his old film called "Audacity." Just so you know, "Audacity" is not gay-friendly. But Ray wants you to know that it's not "hateful." That's pretty much his hook. "It's not hateful!" It took me about 15 minutes before I became convinced that I will never watch "Audacity." That's the power of Ray Comfort's persuasion!

There was one portion of the interview that annoyed me, partly for Ray's question, but also partly due to Kevin's response. This is at the 18:5 mark:
Ray: I've got a question for you, Kevin. You know the lady in Oregon that was fined $135,000 for refusal to bake a cake for a gay wedding? Did you hear about that?

Kevin: I did.

Ray: Do you think that was fair? Did she do wrong?

Kevin: That is not actually the full story of that situation. The full story is that the lawsuit... And I'm trying to remember as I say it so if I get something wrong, people can fact-check later. But from my understanding of the story, is that there was the refusal to do the cake and the couple went home, was distraught and another family member -- the mother -- went in... Basically, they filed a complaint but it was not a public complaint. It was a private complaint with the city. And then when the cake-makers received the complaint in the mail or however they get that information, they were the ones who went online. They posted photos online with their names and their address and who these people were. That is what escalated to the fine and to the amount of the damages received and it wasn't simply a fine because they rejected them. But that's how things escalated.

But, I don't want this conversation to be... I understand what you're saying. But this conversation isn't about the persecution of... what people would say is the persecution of Christians or religious freedom.

Ray: I wasn't going there. I was going to ask you another question after that. And that was, would you bake a cake for a couple that was going to have lion meat at their reception? They were going to kill a lion at the wedding... Like you kill a pig at a BBQ? And they were going to have fresh lion meat at the reception. Would you bake the cake for them?

Kevin: Well, I would like to... I am not... I would like to... I am interviewing you, so I would like to ask you the questions if you don't mind. I know that this is how you seem to conduct your interviews and your realm of thinking and it gets people into where they want to go. So I would rather get back to your film and the questions about your film.

Ray: Okay, but I was just trying to make a point. Melissa Klein didn't hate gay people. She didn't do it because of that. She did it because she's got moral convictions that it's wrong to celebrate a gay wedding in the same way that you or I would probably not want to bake a cake for people who're having lion meat at a wedding or a pedophilia wedding. We'd say, "No! I'm not making a cake for that!" And so, it's not that we hate people. It's that we love people. But we've got convictions that are very strong and very dear to us and that's the point I was trying to make.
First of all, Kevin is largely correct. There were also complications by the indirect results of the Kleins doxxing the lesbian couple. They were inundated by harassing phone calls and media scrutiny as a result of them filing a complaint with the state. Meanwhile, they were foster parents who were in the process of adopting their foster children. This harassment almost resulted in them losing custody of their kids.

Ultimately, I have concerns about the amount of the fine. I think that such fines should be painful, but not fatal. If you know what I mean. But don’t feel too bad for the Kleins. The Christian community has come together and raised over a half-million dollars for them, so their $135,000 fine is already taken care of.

Incidentally, the Kleins have sent out free cakes and copies of “Audacity” to 10 different LGBT advocacy groups. Which is interesting…

Back to my earlier point. Oregon bars discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation – same as race, gender, disability, etc. The Kleins’ business got in trouble because they explicitly discriminated against this lesbian couple on the basis of sexual orientation. If they had discriminated on the basis of religion (for example, an interfaith couple’s wedding cake), they likely could have faced a similar complaint and fine.

Oregon doesn’t bar discrimination on the basis of meat-preference. I’m not sure that eating lion meat is illegal, but poaching is. So, it’s possible that the lion-slaughter might be illegal in Oregon. The “pedophilia wedding” would certainly be illegal though. In other words, the baker might want to focus on calling the police instead of saying, “I won’t bake your cake!”

But let’s assume that the wedding is actually serving lion-meat at the wedding. Or step it back and say that they’re slaughtering a couple of goats at the reception and then sitting around for hours while the animals are skinned, butchered, and prepared for eating… What business is it to the cake-baker??

I’ve had two weddings in my lifetime. We had a commitment ceremony back in the 90s and a wedding back in 2010. I’ve attended other weddings for family members and friends. I have never heard of a cake-baker who has insisted on signing off on the wedding or reception. Never.

They are paid money – lots of it, usually – to design and prepare wedding cakes. The cake is usually picked up by a third party or by the couple and taken to the reception venue.

Now you can make an argument about couples contracting with businesses that are at the very least non-hostile towards the wedding party. And you could make an argument for moving on if you run into a business that discriminates against you. And you could make an argument (as I vaguely did above) about the size of fines related to these discrimination cases. But people have the right to file a complaint if they feel that they were discriminated by a business on the basis of race, gender, disability, religion, and a variety of other descriptors, including (in some states and/or communities) sexual orientation.

So if you want to have a business and you want to be overtly hostile or discriminatory towards LGBT customers, I would suggest that you move to a state or a community that doesn’t bar discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. That doesn’t mean that you might not face scrutiny from the public should your story get released in the news or on social media, but you won’t have to worry about any official investigations or fines.

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

Catching Up // 11 Reasons to Enjoy ARCHIE VS. PREDATOR #3-4!

It's true. I'm over a month behind on reviewing some of my favorite comic books. I'm tempted to let all of them go and to move forward, but the completist in me really needs to follow up on the ARCHIE VS. PREDATOR series, which wrapped up last month.

ARCHIE VS. PREDATOR is a joint comic book venture between Archie Comics and Dark Horse Comics. It features the writing of Alex de Campi, the pencils of Fernando Ruiz, the inks of Rich Koslowski, coloring by Janet Miller, and lettering by John Workman. And it features one of the most unanticipated cross-overs in recent history!

Here's how we got to ARCHIE VS. PREDATOR #3-4: The entire Riverdale Gang won an all-expenses-paid vacation to a remote tropical island during their Spring Break. Betty and Veronica -- spurred on by Cheryl Blossom -- got into a bloody fistfight over Archie's affections. Betty discovered a ebony blade contained within a remote "Jaguar Goddess" shrine and -- in a moment of anger/silliness -- called down vengeance on both Cheryl and Veronica. That's when the Predator (who just came down to Earth of a hunting event) skinned by Cheryl and Jason Blossom alive!

The Gang decided to return to Riverdale, but ended up bringing the Predator back with them! He then began systematically slaughtering anyway with a knife or a gun, including Pop Tate, Sabrina, Kevin, Moose, Midge, Reggie, Chuck, General Keller, and Salem the Cat! This left us at the end of ARCHIE VS. PREDATOR #2 wondering how to move forward!

The violence continued for the rest of this series. To be sure, nobody -- and I mean, NOBODY -- left this series unscathed.

But here's the thing... This series might have been called ARCHIE VS. PREDATOR, but this wasn't an Archie story. It was all about Betty and Veronica (and the Predator, of course). The girls inadvertently instigated the Predator Hunt, the girls were central to the Predator Hunt, and the girls were key to resolving the Predator Hunt. Archie and the others were ultimately there for the ride!

I'm going to steal an idea from this blog post and highlight some of the great moments from the final two issues of this series. To be clear, THERE WILL BE SPOILERS ABOUT ARCHIE VS. PREDATOR #3-4. Graphic, bloody spoilers. If you don't want to be spoiled, then you should stop reading now. You have been warned.

Here are eleven reasons to enjoy ARCHIE VS. PREDATOR #3-4:

1. Sabrina's Home Has Magical Defenses: Betty and Veronica snuck over to Sabrina's home at the beginning of issue #2. She evaluated Betty's ebony blade and confirmed that it is indeed an object of dark magic -- and it's key to defeating the Predator. Unfortunately, the Predator brutally slaughtered our favorite Teenage Witch before she could offer any suggestions.

Of course, the Greendale Police Department investigated this bloody murder -- and ended up finding a mass grave at her home. That revelation resulted in Riverdale's police force traveling to its sister city to help out with the crime scene -- thereby forcing the Riverdale Gang to defend their community from the Predator. But we received one final indication that the Riverdale Police Department would be of no use in this story: They tripped some sort of magical defense system! This causes the Spellman house to vanish and the cops to all turn into goats. Bah!!!


2. The Riverdale Support Squad Ain't Half Stupid!: Jughead returned to the school at the beginning of AVP #3 with news that most of their friends were wiped out by the Predator. This leads to a powwow between Ginger, Nancy, and Big Ethel that completely makes sense. "We're leaving town!" They invite the others to join them -- but frankly, they're survival chances increased 100 fold by leaving Betty and Veronica behind!


3. Jughead Just Can't Catch a Break!: Jughead stopped briefly for a chocolate bar and ended up getting evicerated by the Predator. I thought that he'd make it through this series intact, but Juggie really has bad mojo these days. He's either heralding in the apocalype or getting his spine forcibly removed! Veronica's epitath was pretty harsh, also: "Oh, Juggiekins. I always said that junk food would kill you." No fair!


4. Dilton's an Egghead!: Dilton probably comes the closet to stopping the Predator compared to most of the other Riverdale residents... except that he does it in a really creepy way. It turns out that he's built a robot version of Archie Andrews. After all, everything about Riverdale High centers around dating and Dilton is the guy who never gets picked. So he built a robot suit patterned after the boy who always gets picked. Fortunately, Robot Archie has a combat-mode that manages to push back against the Predator...


5. No More Dilton!: ... Until he lets down his guard and opens up his suit. Things aren't too pretty for Dilton once he does that!


6. Lodge Manor Has a Magic Medical Machine: Veronica might not be a Teenage Witch, but her family has a medical device that evidently can fix any medical condition, including near-fatal stab wounds, as we discover in AVP #4!


7. Unfortunately, Veronica Isn't Good at Reading Instructions: Veronica set the machine on "11," when it's never supposed to be used beyond "4" -- much to Archie's dismay! Of course, why would you create a machine in the first place with such off-the-wall instructions??


8. Introducing Pureheart the Powerful?: We find out what happens if you turn up the Lodge's magic medical machine to an "11" setting. It turns your daughter's clutzy boyfriend into a musclebound beefy hunk with superhuman strength!



9. Fighting! Gunfire! Stabbing! Carnage!: The final fight scene between Betty & Veronica and Archie and the Predator is off-the-walls! Like I wrote before, nobody escapes unscathed -- especially Archie!!


10. Girl Power for the Win!: Veronica might have a gut-wound and Betty might be missing an arm, but these two gals finally take out the Predator with one final decisive attack! That's what happens when you slaughter everyone's favorite redhead!


11. The End?: Betty manages to drag Veronica into Lodge Manor's panic room and both girls are fixed up by the magic medical machine. Betty & Veronica survived! They were triumphant against the mighty Predator! But I think Betty might have lost it a little when she witnessed Archie's death! It turns out that there was a third survivor -- and the magic medical machine has a plastic surgery option. Oh Boy! Maybe we're looking at Pureheart the Predator in future months!!


This was a great series! If you haven't read it yet, then run over to your local comic book shop and pick up the back issues -- or wait a month or two for the trade paperback collection that's bound to be published! It is completely worth it for all of the crazy, bloody, and subversive wackiness!